Passionate
by DeLa Nuit
Summary: Lila's POV during Somebody's Watching. OneShot.


Lila Archer is not a well known name in Hollywood, but that doesn't matter to her. She doesn't do this job for the money or the fame. She does it because it's who she is. Because when she's acting, she feels alive. Because it's the only thing since she was a little girl that she has loved. That she woke up and thought about. That she craved more than anything. The first time she got on stage, she was almost sick. Not because of nerves, not because she was scared, but because of excitement, of pride. And when they clapped for her, applauded her 3rd grade recital, she knew that this is what she wanted to do for the rest of her life. That no matter what happened, this is what she was supposed to be.

And from that day forward, she worked toward that goal. She got into the best Art school around and she succeeded. She passed with honors and rose every occasion. Everyone does something they don't like at first, because they have to. They act before they can direct. They do commercials before they get that first spot. And when she got that first acting job, she didn't complain, but did the best she could. And now, she has a reoccurring role on a hit show. The show might not be the best thing. It might not be the big screen. She might not be Angelina Jolie, but she's only 24 years old. She's got plenty of time. She's got plenty of chances.

And then everything changes. Someone comes in and they try to take away her dreams. They say they want to help, but this isn't the way she wants to succeed. This isn't the way she wants to get to the top. The way she wants to get her name in the papers. But she won't give up. She won't give in on the one thing she loves.

And then she meets him, things change again. Something else other than acting gets her heart racing. Something else makes her palms sweat. But she plays it cool. She's in control. She has too much to worry about, but she uses the new feelings to her advantage. She distracts herself. She flirts and grins and makes him fumble over his words with her smile - a smile she has perfected for photo shoots and advertisements. She shows a little of what she feels but holds back a lot. It's not the time to like someone. Not when her life could be in danger. Not when her career could be in jeopardy. And yet when she strips down to her bathing suit, she feels his eyes on her and she can't help but internally squeal. She feels 13 again and maybe that's why she pulls him into the water. Maybe she just wanted to be close to him. She needs that.

She needs a moment where all the bad things that her mother warned her that comes with fame doesn't bother her. She needs this moment where she's not Lila Archer, actress, but Lila the girl in the pool kissing Spencer the boy. And when he kisses her back, when he shows that he needs her too in that moment. She thinks that maybe he's not Dr. Reid, FBI agent, but just him. Just Spence, a boy that graduated at high school as a preteen. A boy that her friend Parker used to pick on and joked that was probably still a virgin to this day. A boy that can kiss pretty well despite all the things she's heard about him.

She wants to scream when she pulls away and she pulls him back, tells him not to worry. They're just two people in a pool. That he needs to keep her close, because she feels faint with his hands on her. She needs him right now. Not because of transference, whatever that is, but because… she doesn't know. She doesn't care.

She doesn't care that he's not like all the other guys that surround her. That he's not famous like her or he's not like his counterparts in his field. She doesn't need buff and an alpha behavior. She doesn't want the strong silent type or the man who flirts with every breath he takes. She likes his uncertainty, his softness. She even likes his awkward attempts at helping. It makes her feel like she doesn't have to be perfect. It makes her appreciate her own faults and little things that people might not like. He's unique and he doesn't mean embarrassed or shamed of it. When she had laughed at his facts, he had merely shrugged. And as he kissed her, he was confident and then shy. Needy and then uncertain, checking on her. Making sure she was okay. He was not like the guys she knew at all. And she likes that.

She likes him. She likes bad clothes and his charming smile. She likes how she could teach him a thing about the arts and he could teach her about…anything else. She likes that he wants to keep her safe. She likes his dorky haircut and how he bites his lip.

And when he saves her life, she likes him for that too, but it's not the main reason. It's not even in the top 10. He doesn't leave after the cops come and take away Mags. He doesn't leave her side. He holds her as she cries. He sits on her bed as she lays there, unable to sleep. He talks to her about useless things until she asks him to talk about him. He obliges and she listens, tiredness overcoming her, but trying to stay awake, just to learn a little more about him. She listens to him talk about his mother and smiles as he gushes about her before he pauses, his voice changes to a sadder tone as he explains her illness. He talks about his father and high school. He talks about Parker Dunley, Harper Hillman, and Alexis Lisbon. And when she finally falls asleep, she feels like she knows everything about him and still wants to know more.

It doesn't make his departure easier. She would have stayed there for hours had his team and her team not separated them. He places his hand on her shoulder and it lingers for a second. She wishes he would kiss her. She wishes she could wrap her arms around his neck and kiss him. But they are in public, surrounded by people who know her and people who know him. She knows he's shy and He knows she's famous. And they both are uncertain about what comes next. If anything will happen after their night in the pool and after. She slightly nuzzles his hand, trying to show him she still cares. That it's not because he saved her and asks him to call. They promise to try and get together again, but she sees doubt in his eyes. That uncertain look and when she walks away, she holds her breath for a second, wondering if she'll see him again. Wondering if they'll be more long conversations and heart-stopping exchanges. She looks over her shoulder, seeing his eyes on her before he ducks into the SUV and she smiles. She'll make sure of it. Because she's a fighter and she gets what she wants. She had found her professional passion and now it was time for the personal.


End file.
